Me: Did our server head to Aruba?
My wife: Yeah, where is she?
Me: I don’t know, but why does the counter seating area look like an episode of Hoarders focused on an eccentric collector of hand-thrown pottery?
My wife: Ha.
Me: Also, why are two of those three spider plants above the pass dead? This can’t be good. Well, at least we know (looks down between the tables to see a dilapidated giant space heater) we’ll be warm.
My wife: Make no sudden movements or you might get torched!
Me: LOL. This food better be life changing.